She sits in a chair looking through her data pad for something as she crosses one leg over the other and reads the definition of Toxic People, she reads it out loud "A toxic person or relationship can simply be described as any negative impact on the other either physically, mentally, spiritually, financially or emotionally."
She brings a dark finger up to her crimson lips and plays her lip piercing thinking off all the people, she knows in her life and who would she consider toxic to her. Of all the roads she has travelled in her life that they have brought her to this point in time. Strong enough to stand up to people that try to enforce their ideals on her. Life is about choices, and choices bring you to decisions and like minded people.
People that wont judge you for what you are not but accept you for who you are. All you to be you, and be there for you when you need someone. She nods her head slowly knowing that she has found that with Damnation Angels. They accept her for who she is, they don't try to change her.
She brings out a picture taken by a friend of herself and her sister, as tears roll down her eyes. All the flurry of emotions come flooding back to her of the betrayal, how it hurt to leave. Knowing in her heart she couldn't stay, nor allow the children to stay. Now finding out her niece is gone, died...only ever meeting her once. She walks over to the fireplace, with tears glistening in her eyes, wondering, hoping that there will be a time with no pain. She rests a hand on the fireplace ledge, feeling the warmth of the blaze, tears flowing down from her green eyes.
She takes the picture out of the beautiful frame, just holding the picture in her hand, taking a deep breath as she whispers goodbye again, already having her tribal marks removed. This was the last thing she has tied to them, the last thing tying emotionally tying her to her hell. Her hand slowly opens its grasp as the picture floats into the fireplace. Seeing the flicking flames lick around the picture quickly making it into ash. She rests her hands on the fire place ledge weeping slightly for what has been lost, what has been done and what could have been. She knows now where to look towards, where her real family is, where her home is.
Her forehead rests on the ledge of the fireplace not understanding why things have happened the way they have but just accepting it for that. She whispers softly to herself as tears fall to the floor again “Loneliness is about the scariest thing there is.” Knowing in her mind she isn't, but then she turns to her empty bed. She shakes her head again as she turns away from the fireplace and walks to her bed that maybe right now its a good thing, a sort of blessing in disguise. She hopes... One can only hope that is the case.
She lies back on her bed with the water still glistening in her eyes, then exhales deeply because she may feel alone but she really isn't and that is what matters. Rubbing her teary green eyes tiredly as she turns onto her side and curls up small, she whispers softly again "I am home." She closes her eyes as a tear falls down her cheek, falling slowly to sleep with a soft smile on her face.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Home is not where you live, but where they understand you
Christian Morganstern
No comments:
Post a Comment